Our Christmas Season

I haven't wrote for a couple of weeks now and I just realized i never even finished my November challenge. The past couple of weeks i have been working really hard on feeling the Christmas spirit. I really have wanted Leighton to feel like this was a special time of year and i wanted us as a family to feel the true reason for the season. I may have gone over board. We spent a lot more on gifts than we previously planed and we didn't really accomplish any of our little daily activities we had planned for the month. We actually didn't even get a tree until just a few days before Christmas. We still had a fantastic holiday though. Leighton got to have several days of being spoiled and loved over and she thought it was just perfect. Here are some of the high lights of our Christmas.

Salt Lake Trip

Ice Fishing

Leighton helped make cookies

Christmas Eve

Christmas Day

Best Friends met Emersyn

 

 Hope everyone spent their time with family and friends and felt the 

love of our Savior this Christmas season.

Merry Christmas!

Mothering a Toddler

Leighton is in a magical little stage of life called "toddler" and I, her mother, am not sure how to actually "mother" a toddler. Every morning since Emersyn was born i have woken up telling myself I am going to show Leighton how much i love her today, I am going to hug her, hold her, play with her, dance with her, read to her, and tell her she is beautiful and special and good job, yay, and thank you. Then about two hours into the day and after the tenth time of pulling her off the counter, out of the toilet, off the tv stand, out of my make up or away from the dog food i snap. I turn into a stressed out smelly (because i haven't showered yet), tired (because i was up with Em all night), starving (because i havent ate yet) monster of a mom. Sometimes i make myself count to 5 before i pull her off the counter for the billionth time, several times i've tried spanking her (which i hate), and some days i just go stick her in her crib so i can have 5 minutes to breather and cool down before i scream at her. She is not even 2 yet. I hate feeling like this, I hate getting angry with her, I hate that as much as try to speak her language or mirror her actions or teach her that things aren't safe she does not understand. Now that my house is clean, and hopefully stays this way, most of my Christmas is up, except for the tree that Kaden hasn't got for me for the third year in a row, and I am finally finished with school and set to graduate I am going to try even harder. I want to promise to myself and to my darling handful of a daughter that from here on out I will take care of her and myself the way i should. Maybe if i'm fed and dressed and awake i will be more patient, and maybe if i am more patient Leighton will be more inclined to listen (heres to hoping). All i want to do is see my daughter be happy and grow and learn and I know that will only happen if i provide the environment for it to. 

1 Month Old

I cant believe this little girl is already a month old. It seems so natural having her here that i didn't even realize it had been her month birthday. Emersyn has grown quite a bit. She really is quite the piglet, eating as often as i let her. She is now wearing 0-3 month clothes and staying awake long enough to show off how strong and aware she can be. This pretty girl still has a head of dark hair and we are pretty sure she will have blue eyes. Leighton is totally warmed up to her now. Still wont say Emma or Emersyn but she does say baby all day long now and loves holding her and giving her kisses. Now because i can't help but show off this beautiful girl and i am obsessed with our family photos, here are a some of our little 1 month old.